Probably the dirtiest riffing I recall from my grad student years was regarding a former colleague who was dating an archivist. Just guess what letters he was filing under...
No more glasses? Yet he gained a unibrow? Not sure that's a 100% improvement.
I'm gonna guess he was filing under B for bed. ;) :P Or maybe C for closet? Hehehe. :P
The new look isn't so bad -- contacts and a bright smile overcome a unibrow any day. You just know Shatner will be filing under G with the orange hottie -- G as in "Gettin' his butt kicked!"
"Filing", what a great euphemism!